


firsts

by bgmblues



Category: DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV), Freedom Fighters: The Ray (Web Series), The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: (sort of), Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - No Powers, Closeted Character, Coming Out, Drabble Collection, Dry Humping, Falling In Love, M/M, POV Leonard Snart, POV Second Person, Secret Relationship, leonard snart and leo snart are the same person
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-27
Updated: 2020-10-27
Packaged: 2021-03-08 18:21:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,253
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27231142
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bgmblues/pseuds/bgmblues
Summary: "I've never done this," he says, that stupid smile on his face and ears turning red. "Me neither," you admit.Or, snapshots of one Leonard Snart realizing maybe falling in love isn't so scary.
Relationships: Earth-X Leonard "Leo" Snart/Ray Terrill, Leonard Snart/Ray Terrill
Kudos: 7





	firsts

**Author's Note:**

> warning there is a liiiiittle bit of naughty time

No one is around to look when Ray kisses you. 

"I've never done this," he admits one night when you're all cooped up in an old abandoned house, lost from exploring the woods together as if something noteworthy will appear. The two of you left behind to poke deeper into the house as other groups looked for firewood (Mick, who claimed _he had it_ ) or maybe phone service (Barry, Iris and Cisco) among various other things you weren't listening to (Caitlin and Ronnie.)

"Me neither," you respond after a solid 15 seconds of standing still. He gives you a reluctant smile.

All this running around behind people's backs is exhilarating. It tears at your heart just as it put its back together. You longed to have the same courage here that you had everywhere else. The ability to put on a mask and know everything would be okay.

Here, you didn't know that. All you knew for certain was that you were crushing on him, harder than you thought possible. Even just the spare glances from across the room made your heart pound. It's stupid and crazy and you want more of it.

He leans in for what you hope is a second kiss, something more than just the peck that was the first, but it never comes.

"Can we go out on a date?" He asks, voice hardly more than a whisper. You've never done that either. Not with someone like him.

"Yeah," you mumble back. You're fully aware you sound breathless, but you also can't find it in you to care. He lifts his hand, maybe to cup your face or something, but he freezes halfway. Something on his hand moves.

You're sure the whole group hears the screech he lets out. Caitlin and Ronnie come stumbling across the house to find you laughing and Ray stomping the ground over and over in hopes the spider on his hand landed down there.

* * *

"I've never done this," he admits, body pressed against body and eyes wide. He's warm against you, warm everywhere, warm in a way you only ever found comfort relating to Lisa and Mick. For all that you preferred the cold, something about this warmth draws you in.

"Me neither," you whisper. He looks down at you, pinned between him and the snow and weak how you will never let anyone else see as long as you live. Even with layers upon layers on, each touch is electric and vibrant and the familiar pounding heart is beginning to go both down and up.

"Sorry," he says after a second, realizing just how it was you were sitting and scrambling to his feet. You can't find it in you to apologize or accept his own, because you're not sorry in the slightest with how your tussling turned into being planted ass first in the snow.

You pull him in quickly, snow covered gloves on his face, to kiss him while you still have the courage to. It's not like you recognize anyone in this park -- it's just adult watching over screaming kid after screaming kid -- but it's still _public_ and that's terrifying for all the wrong reasons.

The look Ray gives you when you pull back is worth it all. The big round eyes and red face and otherwise amazed expression.

"Would you be up for a second date?" You find yourself asking. Ray grins back in response.

"We can make that more, if you'd be my boyfriend," the way he says it (not quite a question, but not a statement), almost shyly, and you already know your answer.

"Of course," you say with a smile of your own. "I'll be holding you to that though."

* * *

"I've never done this," he says dumbly, fidgeting in his seat. "Is this a thing people actually do?"

"Me neither," you admit, "But I've heard plenty.” _Y’know, from Mick, because he’s the one who knows this stuff_. The movie blares on in front of you, some R-rated flick you didn’t actually pay much attention to picking out, having only cared that it had naked women and sex and blood. Ray wasn’t into girls but you were and all that mattered here was the mood.

You finally lean forward to kiss him, hands on his face and tongue on his lips. His mouth opens willingly, breath mixing with yours. Your eyes flutter closed. It's so much easier to get lost in the sensation now. The way the movie booms on in the background and light flashes on the other side of your eyelids.

Ray kisses you deeply, doing his best to meet your unpracticed enthusiasm with his own. Your teeth clack together, but you find yourself getting flustered all the same. His hand comes up around the back of your neck just as he nibbles on your lip. Thankfully his mouth is there to muffle the gasp you can't quite suppress.

The sex scene is long since over by the time you pull back, lips swollen and arousal twisting deep in your gut. His eyes are glossy in much the same way you feel overall, reflecting the light of the screen. You're very, very thankful for the jacket over your lap.

"We should try and watch some of the movie," you halfheartedly suggest. He pulls you in for another kiss. And another, and another, until you have a flashlight shining in your faces and a theater worker telling you to knock it off.

You comply in a way you haven't in ages, breath heavy and heart pounding, sliding away from Ray as best you can in side by side seats. You're way past turned on and also more than just a little embarrassed over how much when all you'd been doing was making out.

You refuse to do _anything_ in a movie theater bathroom though. Jerking off would have to wait until you got home. In the back of your mind, the idea of giving the rest of yourself entirely to Ray plants itself.

Haven't even told Lisa or Mick yet. Shit.

* * *

"Never done this before," he slurs, maybe a little too far gone from the beer to be driving. Nobody else was even _close_ to the level of clarity he was at (that also knew how to drive) though, so here he was driving you, Barry and Cisco back to the stupid cul-de-sac they all lived in. Mick, among others, hadn't even been able to show up and you were left hitching a ride with Ray and nobody else the wiser.

"And you shouldn't do it again," you try to sound in charge when you say it, but while Ray is on the line of tipsy and drunk, you're _hammered_ . It must come out as a mess though because he gives you a _look_ and laughs.

"This is _so_ bad," Barry adds in dumbly, because the worst thing he's probably ever done was copy someone else's homework. "This is…illegal." Cisco promptly bursts out into laughter. Laughter that you can't help but latch onto. You wheeze into the seatbelt, one hand clutching your already pained side and the other coming to run through your hair.

The car hums when you sit at a stoplight, faint glow and halos of LED lights from fast food stops and signs. Ray looks over to you, grin on his face and in that moment he looks so fucking beautiful that all you can even think of doing is lunging over the console and kissing him hard. Barry and Cisco go dead silent. Can't find it in you to care, though, not with your boyfriend's lips on yours. Until the car behind you honks and oh yeah you guess the light turned green.

While he's still flustered, you thump at the wheel to honk back as if to say _fuck you too_. Even more flustered and perhaps even scandalized, he smacks your hands away and drives off maybe a little too fast. In the corner of your eye you see Barry and Cisco each fumbling with their phones. You turn around to stare them down.

"Nobody will ever believe you if you tell them," you say, as if that will convey that you're still in the closet and the fear you'll have later when you stop to think about it. You don't think they'll say anything, but you also know how gossip travels.

Ray just gives you an encouraging look.

* * *

"I've never done this," you mumble into his ear, hot breath on his neck and straddling one of his legs. He already looks debauched, hair sticking up every which way and face red. 

“Me neither,” he admits, voice low. His body rocks up against yours, desperate for anywhere near the amount of friction you have. You're too far gone to care about how you look by now, pants undone and humping Ray's thigh. Your hands smooth over his skin, shirts long forgotten. He pulls you in from where you hide your face in his neck to kiss you again. Your mouths move together out of sync, pulling back and then pushing forward without rhythm.

You moan into his mouth when his hands come to cup your ass, trying to hoist you up further. You grind down against him as if in spite. Though it gives you an anchor, it's still not enough.

You chant your pleas absentmindedly against his lips, the remainder of your composure quickly melting away. Finally he pulls you up far enough that you can feel his erection through his pants against yours, rather than against your bare stomach. He stutters a gasp into your mouth.

Ever greedy, he doesn't stop now that he has what he wants. You feel him fumble under your jeans, attempting to drag them down from the back. You force yourself up for just a moment to let him push them down, then his own pants, before you're back at grinding down against him. Despite your underwear still in the way, everything _feels_ so much more. Your chanting grows louder and louder with each passing moment, warmth growing in your gut.

"Babe, please," he gasps, "Please, please, I'm so close, please--"

You cum in your boxers with a cry, spunk still finding its way over his stomach. His mouth opens uncontrolled at the sight, sobs falling from his lips as he follows you over the edge.

You lay against him despite the sticky wet feeling over you both, catching your breath. Finally you roll off him, collapsing into the bed and feeling more satisfied you ever have in your life. Part of you wants to keep going, to mess around more, but you know that's not really an option.

"Do you have some clean underwear I can borrow?" You finally joke. Ray sits up and leans over to kiss you again, grin on his face.

* * *

"Never seen you like this," Lisa says, eyes curious but innocent. "Actin' like those girls in movies that met a cute boy and become all happy all the time." She pauses. "Didja meet a cute boy, Princess Lenny?" She asks in that same sarcastic drawl you have.

"I did meet a cute boy," you admit. It was about time Lisa knew. She narrows her eyes and wrinkles her nose. "Oh," she says simply. "A cute _boy_?"

"A cute boy," you confirm as if it's not a big deal. Lisa was still a child despite her newly gained teenage status -- she needed to know that with you she was welcome no matter who she chose to kiss. You were there for her, even if your father never would be.

"His name is Ray," you continue on, because now you're going and you can't stop. How you want Lisa to see this last hidden side of you. "He's real nice. Likes to do all those cheesy romance things like in the movies."

Lisa relaxes at this, clearly thinking something over. She shifts before looking away.

"If you like guys, can I think girls are real pretty too?" She finally asks. A smile tugs at your lips.

"Of course you can," you say earnestly. She nods.

"That's good," she says, "'Cause I always thought your friend Caitlin was pretty."

You can't help but laugh. Of course Lisa would've already started thinking about it on her own. She accepted you just as you accepted her. That's what siblings were for.

Though, you think you'll leave the interest in wearing skirts for another day. Talks of feelings and secrets like this weren't a thing in your family. You can only imagine she's ready to move just as you are.

You pull out your phone first, thumbing through your passwords and locks until you get to Ray's messages and pull up a selfie he'd taken of the two of you lying in his bed with his lips pressed into your curly hair in an exaggerated kiss. Just the sight of it makes you feel warm and bubbly and as much as you want to say otherwise, you think you've already fallen in love with him.

"He's got big ears," Lisa teases. Even _that_ makes you feel fuzzy inside. How stupid.

"He does," you agree. The fondness in your voice is hard to miss. Lisa looks up to you, unusually silent and contemplative.

"You're in love with him," she states. The sigh that escapes your lips is resignation; there's no way to deny it.

"I think I just may be," you admit.

You've never done that, but maybe it wasn't so scary after all.

**Author's Note:**

> thank u all for coming please comment subscribe and hit that mf like butto-


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